I'm in heaven. We've been in the "why" phase for three days now.
In the Kitchen
"Devon, we do not put our banana peels on the floor!"
"Why?"
"Because it makes a big mess and Mommy just cleaned the kitchen!"
"Oh, is THAT right?"
In the Car
"Mommy, I just want to sit here and not be buckled."
"No, I have to buckle you."
"Why?"
"Because it keeps you safe. Even Mommy has to buckle herself when she sits in the car. When policeman drive by, they make sure that we are all buckled in because they want us to be safe."
"Of course, Mommy!"
In the Bathroom
"Devon, do not throw water out of the tub!"
"Why?"
"Because it makes the floor slippery so people could fall!"
"And then what would happen?"
"Well, if Mommy or Daddy or Carrie and Melina slipped and fell, they would hurt themselves. They would feel really bad."
"And they would cry!"
"Yes, they might even cry it hurt so bad."
"And then what would happen?"
"Well, depending on how badly they were hurt, Mommy might fix their owies. If they were hurt really badly, I might not be able to."
"And then they would have to go to the HOSPITAL!"
"Yes!"
"And they would ride in an Ambulance with Trey's mommy!"
"Yes, Trey's mommy and the other paramedics would buckle them into a special bed and ride with them to the hospital!"
"Oooohhhhh!"
"But riding to the hospital in an ambulance is not fun. It is very scary. It is only for people who are very hurt and not doing very well."
"And it goes 'whoo whoo whoo whoo'"
"Yes, it does."
"And then what would happen?"
"When they got to the hospital, the doctors would fix their owies. They would use big machines and sharp needles. People get better at the hospital, but it also hurts a lot. It would be much better if we were just careful so our family is safe and doesn't get hurt in our house."
"Oh, is THAT right?"
Why do I love the "why" phase? It's cause and effect! Devon is exploring the consequences of his actions and the impact he has on other people and his environment. He is finally figuring out that his behaviors have very predictable antecedents.
It's a pretty important step to learning. I get a little frustrated when there's a pretty predictable pattern and he just doesn't seem to be catching on. Like the spanking he gets every time he squirms out of my grasp in a parking lot, only to do it again at the earliest opportunity. Or the time I swore I was finally going to get him to tell me how many...
"Let's count the ducks, Devon!"
"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, EIGHT!"
"How many ducks?"
"THESE!"
No, let's try it again. Let's count the ducks!"
"How many ducks?"
"THESE!"
No, let's try it again. Let's count the ducks!""One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, EIGHT!"
"How many ducks?"
"THESE!"
No. (deep breath) Eight ducks, Devon. EIGHT DUCKS! Let's try it again. Let's count the ducks!"
"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, EIGHT!"
"How many ducks?"
"THESE!"
No, let's try it again. Let's count the ducks...."
I'm glad the tables have finally turned. The past six months have found me asking HIM 'why' plenty of times...
WHY did you lay in your bed for an hour refusing to nap and then fall asleep on the five-minute drive to the grocery store?
WHY did you just lick the top of the salt shaker?
WHY do you wake up at five minutes to seven o'clock every morning regardless of how late Mommy let you stay up the night before?
WHY is a table more fun to color on than a piece of paper?
WHY is a pink princess sippy more attractive than a red-topped Lightning McQueen sippy? Does milk that you swiped from somebody else really taste better?
WHY must you remove your shoes and socks as soon as I start the car?
Don't get me wrong. These aren't things that make me particularly upset. I just really want to know.
"Mommy, I need hugs!"
"Just a minute, Devon. Mommy is writing."
"Why?"
"Because I love you and I want to remember all these interesting things about you. Can it wait five minutes?"
"Why?"
Pause.
"You're right, Devon."
I gotta go.
Loved this!
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